The “Ifs”

It is easy to look back on your life and say, “If I had known”, or “If it was this way” you’re life might be different. But it’s the “if” that gets you. You didn’t know, what you didn’t know.  And “ifs” are not productive unless it's coupled with knowledge to make an empowered choice. Although sometimes painful, experienced life knowledge can build a stronger understanding and resilience to changes and a greater empathy for your past self and for others.  For me personally, the more I understand my own workings, my own relationship to the world around me, the more I can see how important it is to value how I show up and participate. This hasn’t always been the case and the journey to living from an empowered self-concept has been a bumpy road. Having a great amount of self-acceptance, patience, and care for my life has been a “learned” skill.

The “ifs” can be a useful thing in your life. Giving your brain something to “if” about can produce a little confirmation bias during your day. Where you can start to notice the “ifs” you put out there. So, instead of the  “If only it could have been this way” you can “What if” your way to positive occurrences in your life.  What if this will work? What if I’m capable?  What if this situation can serve a greater understanding? I’m not saying this is an easy thing to do, or remember to do. But the more you can understand and work with your brain’s natural ability to find confirmation, the more open you can be to a positive “what if”.